It seems they are both selfish, then, because Lan Xichen cannot help but feel relief at seeing him here - but then, they have already talked about this, have they not? Before Lan Xichen kissed him, when they both agreed they could be selfish together because they were not sure what they would do without the other there.
He forgoes propriety, for the moment, and when Huaisang bows to him - he reaches out to curl his hands under his forearms and tug him in for a hug. He had been so worried, not only for Huaisang's safety, but that he would have inadvertently broken his promise that he would no longer be alone.
"I would never," he murmurs, needing to make sure he knows. "A-Sang, I would never have left you alone, not by choice."
He should not have allowed himself to get so carried away, when they were both under outside influence, but regardless, he would not have wanted Huaisang to wake up alone.
Huaisang's arms wrap around Xichen tightly when he's drawn in by the other. He lets himself cling to him for a while, because he really had been afraid, been afraid of losing him -- of the possibility that the other would have left him alone. But as the other speaks he believes him -- as he always does. It's hard for his trust to be shaken in the other for very long at all.
Still, he doesn't lighten his hold on the other swallowing and then taking a few deep breaths.
"I was... when I woke up alone I thought maybe you had regretted it all."
He swallows as well as Huaisang keeps clinging to him, holding him close for a long moment before he slides one hand up to gently brush through the other's hair. Lan Xichen keeps that up for a little bit as he considers his response.
"I regret not being there when you awoke to talk about it with you once we were not under the influence with anything, and that we are not in a safe place to do so now." Not that the other hotel was really a safe place - if it is indeed a different hotel, which Lan Xichen is not entirely convinced of - but at least it was familiar. "But I do not regret anything else."
Huaisang felt something ease a bit in his chest and he keeps ahold of him a while longer as the other speaks. It all aches somehow still but at least he knew that the other didn't regret him. He wants to be able to talk through it all but he's right that this place isn't really safe. There are other things that should be on their mind. When he was younger, Huaisang might have demanded to talk despite it but he isn't so self-centered anymore.
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He forgoes propriety, for the moment, and when Huaisang bows to him - he reaches out to curl his hands under his forearms and tug him in for a hug. He had been so worried, not only for Huaisang's safety, but that he would have inadvertently broken his promise that he would no longer be alone.
"I would never," he murmurs, needing to make sure he knows. "A-Sang, I would never have left you alone, not by choice."
He should not have allowed himself to get so carried away, when they were both under outside influence, but regardless, he would not have wanted Huaisang to wake up alone.
no subject
Still, he doesn't lighten his hold on the other swallowing and then taking a few deep breaths.
"I was... when I woke up alone I thought maybe you had regretted it all."
no subject
He swallows as well as Huaisang keeps clinging to him, holding him close for a long moment before he slides one hand up to gently brush through the other's hair. Lan Xichen keeps that up for a little bit as he considers his response.
"I regret not being there when you awoke to talk about it with you once we were not under the influence with anything, and that we are not in a safe place to do so now." Not that the other hotel was really a safe place - if it is indeed a different hotel, which Lan Xichen is not entirely convinced of - but at least it was familiar. "But I do not regret anything else."
no subject
"I don't regret it either."
And what does that mean for them exactly?